| i packed up all of your things.
deleted your number from my phone.
am working on erasing your messages.
and doing what i can to be content with what was
without romanticizing moments we shared
forgiving myself for letting it get to this point...
and forgetting that i was really happy for a while. before this all fell apart. | comments: Leave a comment   |
| negatives!
- getting into a car accident this morning... i was hit slightly ahead of my front wheel on the driver's side.
positives!
+ getting into the best possible accident (meaning i'm okay - a little shaken up and sore but still okay... and there's no internal damage so it's still drivable... there's just a little over $1500 in repairs to the body which have to be done so that the wheels don't get ruined) in the best possible place at the best possible time (right before my therapy apt. which happens to be held in the upstairs of a small claims office... ha!)
+ being proud of how i reacted (calmly and logically with compassion and patience!)
+ since it wasn't my fault (he turned into me...) i don't have to be concerned with my insurance going up.
+ having a great therapy session as a result
i'm just tired. and called into work already. and am going to spend the day with a good friend tomorrow. two actually.
i'm spending the rest of the night inside my room watching movies and reading. | | comments: Leave a comment |
|
do yourself a favor
and purchase...
across the universe (thank you laki)
i'm pretty much in love with this boy. specifically during this song... especially when he hums. oh my goodness do i love him when he hums. *swoon*
soo not rehab appropriate. but still really good.
today has quite possibly been one of my better sick days.
mostly because yesterday i...
- went to the clinic... yay for a severe sinus infection with fever!
- sent amber and mike wedding photos
- picked up my meds and some goodies
- rented a ridiculous amount of movies (all of which i watched today)
- aaand did my laundry after cleaning my room
which meant that today i was able to spend all day in bed - juice, snacks, meds, cough drops and kleenex by my side - watching movies and napping periodically throughout the day.
even when i was feeling down today... because i do miss him. friends once again went above and beyond what was expected...
thank you.
jessica's birthday on saturday!! 80's throwback!
----------
so... is it strange that part of me is more than excited about our washing machine being broken simply because this gives me an excuse to use a laundromat?
there's just something wonderful about spending the morning alone in a warm place that smells sooo delicious, drinking coffee and reading quietly about lions, witches, and wardrobes.
hopefully it rains too.
just me?
----------
multnomah falls was beautiful today.
(and yes... this IS tilt-shift photography... sadly, not mine)
after helping grace run wedding errands in vancouver, i headed back to pdx so that meredith and i could spent the day drinking hot cocoa, hiking around multnomah falls, taking quite a few ridiculous photos, and talking and laughing and praying.
today was such a day of renewal.
oh. and in case i haven't mentioned it enough... God provides in such unconventional ways...
His love is such a comfort.
i want to start journaling more here... just about living in oregon. good things and bad
but i think i'm going to do it in another blog... which i've yet to make.
more a list of things so i remember events. photos too.
i've just noticed how much easier it is for me to dismiss good things because of bad... so i figured this would provide a nice catalyst for valuing good things.
here goes. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| is anyone in need of a roommate? possibly looking for someone to find a place with?
one of my best friends is in dire need of housing! if anything comes up (or even if you know of a friend who has an uncle who knows a guy...) with a basement and/or fairly close-in... please let me know!
craigslist has failed him terribly... so i'm hoping a little networking might work.
if you have any questions about him or the situation (meaning when he could move in... which would be as soon as possible or anything along the lines of how much he's willing to chip in each month... etc. etc.), send me a reply and i can help you get in touch.
i'll take any leads i can get.
please keep me posted. thank you everyone! | | comments: Leave a comment |
| and so it goes.
i had a fairly amazing night.
most of which was spent playing apples to apples, eating waaay too many brownies, and laughing with new friends.
new christian friends at that!
God is unconventional.
i need to trust that he knows what he's doing...
even if for the time being
my heart isn't exactly okay.
it's on the mend though.
and i have three people specifically to thank for that.
grace... matt... and nate.
they're my safety.
they're my strength.
they're why i smile.
i'll be just fine. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| i'm currently 87% happy in portland.
it's climbing though!
also - i'll be home for my birthday... and would love to see as many people as possible. details to follow! i miss you all.
God is good. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| good things!
- amber and mike getting married!
- being asked to be in amber and mike's wedding
- getting a new job as a youth counselor (see: http://www.northwestbhs.com/)
- leaving oliver's on good terms
- catherine moving in november 1st
- jon moving in december 1st
- keeping in touch with friends
- seeing jon thomm in a few weeks!
- seeing my mom in a few weeks!
- getting a new (used) car soon
- running/weight watchers
- exploring portland
- finding places to call my own...
- feeling the wind push me forward while walking home, listening to bat for lashes
- going on dates
- going out more with friends in portland (see: isaac!)
- going to church more consistently
- taking time for myself
not-so-good things...
- being internet-less for the next few days
- not being able to be home for christmas/my birthday/new years
- having to take 3-4 different buses (totally 76-125 minutes) to work until i'm able to purchase said car
- working everyday for the next 2 weeks
- being too tired to work out/super hungry after work
- kate moving out
- missing my family
- missing my close friends
- missing being able to see matt every other day (dating him too...)
- not sleeping very well
- getting far to drunk for my own good
- missing sunday night services at st. marcus
- having to choose between spending time alone (which i really need right now) or working to establish new friendships (something i also need right now)
- finding a balance. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| i hardly ever use my lj anymore
and i've recently shy-ed away from using my other journal...
hmm | | comments: Leave a comment |
| tonight...
a very nice boy took me out for sushi
and then played black-lit-pirate-themed-mini-golf with me
and then took me dancing
and then kissed me in a cab. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| dear ovaries,
please take a vacation until you stop feeling this overwhelming need to be so violently angry at me. i'll understand. you're more than welcome to come back once you're willing and able to discuss this like adults instead of tormenting me relentlessly.
thank you,
the management. | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| i'm mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. it's been a long week... (week meaning thursday-ish to sunday because of the whole working in a restaurant deal) but i have tomorrow off which means i'm meeting up with a friend (jason) for coffee and then heading over to visit kalii at work after i go for a run at bally's.
life is good.
just
really
tiring. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| every day trying to make up for the one before
climb three flights to tremble at the sight of your already open door
the frustration I see when I tell you I'd like some company
breaks my heart
how can you be so impartial?
and I've made myself the fool
who's fallen for you
so let me down softly this time and
I wont have to come back cryin'
I've just made myself look bad and
you're the one who should be feelin' bad
it'd be better to forget you
but I don't really want to
it'd be better to forget you
but I don't really want to
energy spent trying to believe you're not worth it
you don't deserve it
but I wish you did 'cause I can't rid the thought of it
and I'll remember you as the second or two
artists I knew who decided to screw me over
'cause it's the bolder thing to do
and I've made myself the fool
who's fallen for you
so let me down softly this time and
I wont have to come back cryin'
I've just made myself look bad and
you're the one who should be feelin' bad
it'd be better to forget you
but I don't really want to
it'd be better to forget you
but I don't really want to | | comments: Leave a comment |
| why is it that it seems i'm destined to be everyone's best friend but no one's girlfriend?
seriously. what happens? what do i do in relationships that stop them from ever developing? | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| | i need to remember who i am. not only remember... but be proud of what defines me. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| good news!
i had an interview at a cafe this afternoon (which i think went really well), am looking at another house tonight, and have 2 more interviews tomorrow. i also received text messages from 2 people i wasn't expecting to hear from for quite some time... it's been a good day.
other news!
i finally have an external hd.
God provides. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| |
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
fromdaytoday's journal
